The Usual Suspicions
An exaltation of Larks may have sung the praises of the Washing Machine as a Sock Divorce Attorney, a Dating Agency, a hideaway motel for Sock Affairs. Or has a blush of boys or a bevy of Beauties suggested your foot perfume resembles a mischief of rats, a surfeit of skunks, a knot of toads or a congress of baboons?
What do the Socks think?
Perhaps said Socks have absconded to the Garter Archipelago for sweeter smelling air, with a party of fish, a parcel of penguins and a mess of iguanas who care.
Are they sick of being walked all over, day after day, year after year? Do Socks tire of never knowing which foot to invest their best in and decide to put a sock in it?
So what then?
There is an armada of Red Herrings hidden within a Washing Machine’s bank of circuits. So where is the department of Lost and Found and to where, do those pesky socks vamoose?
I’m not really suppose to say but…
The answer has been top secret for years. Recently a Parliament of Owls, voted that the Secret Observance Collation Kaleidoscope, (SOCK) undergo restructuring. With permission from a ponder of philosophers, I am permitted to tell you this; if a pace of asses don’t run off with my words.
First, make sure no one else is listening, this is Intergalactic Classified Information (ICI). It’s a …are you sure, really sure nobody’s sneaking a peek at my digital squeak? Not a totter of giraffes, a souse of lions, a skulk of foxes or a sleuth of bears? We don’t want anyone to rumble a rafter of plump murmurings anywhere. Was that a whoop of gorillas I heard just then? Is it safe to share? Ok, your sure.
The Plan
A Disguising of tailors had a plan to muster an experiment in Teleportation, but first they sought the stamp of approval. A swarm of politicians conferred with a sequitur of logicians. But the tailors wearied of the shuffle of bureaucrats’ constant debating and the slew of homework waiting. So they secreted away a skein of silk with a zap of lasers to the torment of trainers, huddled by Hubble; a brilliant constellation, expectant of a glossy consignment. But a wake of Buzzards saw their fare and soon their embezzlement was squared. Thereby creating the sensation of sock vacations, and the cessation of hosiery unification.
How do I know such surreptitious things? As socks are the stars of the Washing Machine world, I burrow down from the AGN (Active Galactic Nucleus) beneath the tub to search the Bulge of Dark Matter. Sometimes I’m pulled adrift into the Supermassive murky cabinet. Others from my warren search the Interstellar Dust in the Detergent dispenser, Inlet Valve, Lint Filter, well you get the picture. But it’s always a mystery where things go between rinse and spin cycle. Perhaps Le Tour de France?
Warm (water) regards
Minuscule golden Wombat
Internal (Sock) Affairs
P.S Off to the Archipelago for a work assignment, At last a Business trip that’s outside of the box 😀
ha! 🙂 love this ❤
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Thanks so much 😀
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and one time Carol Burnett had a comic skit on a heaven where all the lost socks go
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That sounds like fun. Wish I seen that.
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Very funny.
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Thanks Meredith.
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Where things go between rinse and spin cycle was asked by Aristotle the jelly fish. You are not alone in asking such profound questions.
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I wonder did Aristotle the jellyfish ever find the answer?
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Unfortunately we will never know. He was eaten by a small child on a day trip to the zoo.
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Mistaken for pear flavoured Jelly I suppose. 🙂
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🙂
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Great fun! I wrote about a sock’s cousin, the baseball stirrup, but it was not in Dark Matter or the murky anything – just stuck to a pair of shorts.
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Thanks. Your baseball stirrup story stirs my curiosity 🙂
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I love this post; and I have new socks, so I brought them to read it 😀
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Hmm I wonder what they think? Better keep a close eye on them! 😀
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I usually do but these latest ones are animal socks, they have eyes, so they’re watching me 😀
this was a real fun post to read, made me laugh
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Have they seen the minuscule golden wombat 😮
Your sock sound really cool.
I’m glad you had a giggle 🙂
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no but I’m thinking they might need to; please direct me to nearest wombat station….
my socks love your post so they pinged you…… hmmm lol puts a whole new meaning on pingbacks suddenly 😀
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😀
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sniff…… sniff sniff……… washer time 😀
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You’re so funny
As long as they’re not of to the Garter Archipelago 😀
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my eyes read that as Gater, as last night I was watching one of my fav film s: ‘Ragin Cajun Redneck Gators’ lol 😀 have lots of fun archipelagoing
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🙂 What a giggler you make me!
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lol thanks for the like of my sky pavements;
my socks are blinking to you 🙂
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That’s so cute! Hi blinky animal socks. Might have to get some too. I’ve got some musical socks but they don’t sing any looney tunes. 🙂
I’m following what you’ve written on pavements. It’s very cool!
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lol you are real kind to follow my pavements thankyou; I was just trying to show you my animal socks on my other blog, that’s why their little eyes were blinking lol 😀
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Wow I’ve just seen, you’ve got four blogs! Now I’m looking for animal socks.
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sorry it’s in float under wordless wednesday; thought you might like them 🙂
have you got your pingbacks enabled lol?
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I’ve just found your socks. They’re adogable and meowvarlous. Thanks for the advice on pingbacks, I’ll take a look right now. 🙂
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I love new words 😀 and I’m a pinback newbie too; when I first saw them from the admin side of answering comments, where they appear in large square brackets, I thought people were pulling my leg over spelling mistakes 😀
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Can’t type for chortling. Yes I know what you mean. 😀
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me too, I have dyslexic fingers; but also and too, each time I saw those big square brackets I kept yelling yes but I’m English we spell it like that 😀
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I used to be able to spell just fine…… then I met the American spellchecker, now I’m constantly thrown for a loop, it’s makes me doubt what I’ve known for years and I end up checking myself on Google to find yes we do spell it like that! 🙂
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Me and my socks loved reading this, although they now know that I know where their secret hiding place is, thanks to you. From me, thanks for clearing up one of life’s little mysteries 🙂
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Thank so much Hugh. Sorry Socks about the reveal, but the golden Wombat will soon return if any of your friends are missing. Goodness Gracious I hope they haven’t been abducted by the Buzzards. 😀
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Fabulous humor! I ran to check if my Santa Claus socks are safe in my drawer. Yep. I love the names you gave animal group and your subtle rhyming.
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I’m glad your Santa socks are safe! Thanks for your kind words. 🙂
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Haha! Nice! Now we know 🙂
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🙂
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Funny! The wombat is cool! Do they eat socks? Thank you againfor linking up and sharing your post with Saturday’s Critters.. Happy Sunday!
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Thanks Eileen. I hope wombats don’t eat socks, even golden ones.
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Well this was fun!
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Thanks so much 😀
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This is great! Thanks so much for sharing 🙂
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Thanks Jennifer. 🙂
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